Normalise Talking About Depression in Church (The Pastor with a Thorn in His Side Book Review)
Depression in real, even in Christians, even in Christians leaders. Let’s keep talking about it.
I’m confident that one of the best ways to deal with depression, and to learn about it if you haven’t suffered with it, is talking about it. Personal experiences are so powerful to make something real and get it out in the open, so I’m grateful for the men who have shared theirs in this book.
There are seven stories from pastors who have suffered from depression at one time or another. They explain what led to it, how they dealt with it, in some cases how they deal with it, and what was or wasn’t helpful as people supported them.
Having suffered from depression myself, I found it helpful to remember that sufferers are not alone and even those who we would naturally think are immune indeed suffer themselves too.
Depression is an illness, not a failure
The natural tendency is to count depression as a failure. A failure to notice the goodness in life. A failure to count your blessings. A failure to be unable to hold mind over matter.
And Christians, especially, should be able to avoid depression — they of all people have reason for joy, hope, and peace, surely?
Each of these stories is evidence that even those you would expect would be nowhere near depression can suffer from it. Therefore, it is surely not a failure. These men have each continued to lead their churches and have a great, positive impact on many people.
Living in a fallen world, mental health issues can affect anyone. Sometimes it will go with time, sometimes medication is needed — just as with physical health issues.
Let’s normalise seeing mental illness as an illness, not a failure. Let’s normalise talking about it so that the stigma fades.
How to help and not to help
The final chapter is a summary of the seven stories. The collection shows that no one suffers in the exact same way, although there are certainly things that are similar.
Sometimes it was circumstantial, sometimes it seemed to come from nowhere.
In many, speaking openly about the struggle was important — with friends, family, doctors, or, in the cases of these pastors, their churches.
Some found distractions, like exercise, helpful but some were led into patterns of sin to cope.
So, when supporting someone with depression, don’t assume. Try to be open and listen well. Care for them and look out for them. Don’t expect too much and don’t push.
There’s lots to learn from reading these experiences!
Encouragement in trials
The biggest encouragement in reading this book is how so many of the pastors saw their experience as preparing them to serve others in the future who have gone through similar experiences. This book in itself is one way that has come to pass!
It’s a great comfort that, even in difficult seasons of life, God has a purpose in it and can bring good out of it. Not only that, but the good that comes from these seasons could only have come if they had taken place.
God has you where he wants you: for your good and the good of his people, and for his glory.
